Well I am in a writing mood again, so here goes.


So as you go along in life your goals become much humbler. When I was a kid I really wanted to be something extraordinary. I wanted to have a real impact on the world, and be one of those people you remember in history books. However, now that I am met with reality, I have come to forget such goals. My life isn't about making a serious impact, that's far too big. I just want to end up in a situation where people respect my ability, where I can pay my bills and put a roof over my own head, and where there are some people who love me.

Those are modest goals compared with the image I had of myself in high school/grade school. That Dennis was going to storm the barracades for what's right. He was going to be a senator or a congressman...the one that would finally do things the way they should be done, with no corruption or anything. He was going to be a rebel, a leader, a fighter.

As the years have gone by, this image of myself has faded away. I've come to realize that what's right isn't always clear. I don't feel very strongly about much in politics and society these days. What I feel in my gut to be the right thing to do always seems so dangerous, and what my mind tells me is probably the best, my heart refuses to accept. I've also come to realize how difficult things really are, and how the problems of the world aren't totally caused by the corruption in Washington. Finally, I've come to realize how much corruption there actually IS in Washington, and how we'll be hard pressed to change such things, even if we all made a concerted effort.

As I've gotten older, I've also come to recognize that, in general, what the polticians in Washington or Boston do rarely affects my life in a significant way (exception...Gay Marriage...which is why I still do really feel strongly about that issue). Personal happiness is rarely given to people by a political movement except in extraordinary cases. Where the vast majority of people have their impact is not on the public stage, but in the interactions of their everyday lives.

I guess that means that my dream of changing people's lives has not really changed, but rather it has matured. I still wish to be remembered, but not by the history books or by the general populace...who cares what the public thinks after all...they are usually morons as a collective and bad judges of character. I want to be remembered by individuals. I want someone to think so highly of me that they name one of their kids after me. I want people to think back at who I was when they knew me and smile or desire to give me a call. I want to feel like I truly love and understand someone, and I want someone to feel the same about me....hopefully the same person.